the rumors are true. it’s my 29th birthday.
I’ve been thinking a lot about 10 years ago— 19 year old debby was producing and acting in an incredibly fun and lovely show, Jessie. I had such a loving family that fostered imagination, excellence, learning, humor and grace. I was in the director’s guild but didn’t have a real high school diploma. I was such a dweeb and so cool and felt so worldly and confident and knew so much I had no business knowing, and yet was so naive to things that it seems I really should’ve known.
I’d soon get distracted… confused in my identity, unmoored in my relationships, disoriented in my values. I got dazzled by the everything so accessible to me. I gave people access to me and forgot to protect myself. I got lost and, in a miracle, found.
So here it is. If you’re 19, just know that your 20s will inherently be messy— but they don’t have to be destructive. Look hard, but look inward. Trust that it’s all in there, especially when you start grabbing at stuff that’s out there. Your 20s absolutely race by, and it’s non-linear.
So much light and love and adventure and experience have come to me in the last ten years. I met my dream lover. I’ve since traveled the world. I made bad friends and locked in incredible ones. I’ve done countless acting jobs with inspiring people who took a chance on me and made me better; I’ve directed and developed and produced and thrown dinner parties and baby showers and game nights and untangled trauma and learned how to make a house a home and made my body feel like a safe place to be and got better at being alone with my thoughts and shared a lot and kept so much privacy and I have so much to look forward to.
So here’s to the last year of my 20s or whatever. Can’t imagine how I’ll feel in another ten years.